Am I Romance Intolerant?

30 11 2007

It’s been a really long time since I’ve watched one of my favorite shows, Sex and the City, and I almost forgot how great the writing and directing is on this show. This has got to be one of the realest shows on television when it comes to portraying single women. I don’t know what it is about these four women, but I feel like I connect with them on so many different levels. And there are several times within many of the shows where I laugh, cry, and ponder deep issues of life and singleness, all in a matter of one half hour. Tonight is one of those nights…

In tonight’s episode, Carrie just recently started dating the Russian guy and he is showering her with all this romance (serenading her, taking her to the opera, naming songs after her, etc.). One day she was having lunch with her friends and they were teasing her about the superficiality of the Russian guy’s antics. Everytime she went into detail about his classic, 18th century chivalry, their response was "Ick." Later on it caused Carrie to wonder if our independent, fast-paced, email, technology world has caused women to become romance intolerant. For many of us, gone are the days where we cherish fancy dinners, love notes and flowers, so does that mean we don’t know how to appreciate true romance when it comes along?

Sadly, I must admit that I believe I just may have become one of those women. I’m so used to doing things myself, so used to email and "let’s go dutch" that my response to anything else is often "Ick." It’s kinda sad, but sometimes I have that reaction because I think it’s corny and other times I have that reaction just because it makes me uncomfortable. But why? I think there’s one part of me that’s just not used to it. I think the other part is not so much that I’m romance intolerant, it’s just that I want romance to be realistic. I don’t have a green thumb so flowers don’t impress me because they’ll die in two days. I hate dressing up and I hate heels so going to a fancy restaurant would probably make me uncomfortable and resentful. (Well, ok, maybe going once in a blue moon wouldn’t be so bad 🙂 But for me, romance becomes real when it’s genuine and reflects a person’s reality/personality in some way.   I’ll tell you about a romantic thing I saw tonight on Sex and the City that actually made me cry…

Miranda proposed to her boyfriend Steve because she’s such a character who’s against pretense. (Just for the record I don’t think I could ever propose to a guy but more power to her). As she began to think about what the big day would be like, she kept saying she wanted to be "normal" and have a wedding that reflected who she and Steve really were, not some fantasy. One day as the two of them were on their way home from the grocery store, Miranda dropped all the groceries and Steve stepped in gum in goofy, classic Steve and Miranda style. As they stood there laughing at themselves, they looked up and saw an old abandoned garden and both decided it would be the perfect place for their wedding. So they got married there in the garden, in a quiet ceremony with about 7 or 8 people present. They exchanged vows. They looked like they meant it. Miranda had on a maroon dress. Steve had on a suit with a maroon tie. After the wedding, all 9 of them went to a restaurant and ate.

But now when the character Charlotte got married, she had all the bells and whistles–the church, the white dress, the bridesmaids, the whole nine yards. And that was romantic, I cried at that too–but it was romantic for her reality. Whatever floats your boat. But for me–maybe a beach, a blue dress and maybe some karaoke ..now that’s romance…

I don’t think I’m romance intolerant per se. I’m just an unconventional gal. And unconventional gals look for unconventional signs of affection. :=)

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One response

3 12 2007
Khalilah

Hmmm a beach, a blue dress, and karaoke – no consecrated ground? LOL!

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