The Bachelor and the “Savior Complex”

15 03 2011

The Bachelor **Ok, before I say what I have to say, let me give this disclaimer. I started watching The Bachelor for research purposes. Really, it's true! My screenplay "Something Worth Waiting For" pokes fun at dating reality shows like The Bachelor and Flavor of Love, so I figured I should watch the show in order to get some tips. I'm embarrassed to admit that I am an educated woman who is also a reality TV hog; however, I have never seen The Bachelor until this season. And just like all the other terribly heinous reality shows I watch on a regular basis, I got sorta hooked after the first episode. I mean, this show didn't quite make it into appointment TV status. I didn't rearrange my schedule around it like I do some other shows, but I did look forward to finding out who got a rose each week…

That being said…I'm still a little salty that Brad chose Emily. I mean, he went on and on about how he was so into Chantel and he could have fun with her, he felt like he had a lot in common with her, and he felt like he could be himself around her…yada yada yada….And then he goes and chooses someone else. My theory? I think he was fixated on the idea that he wanted to be a father to Emily's daughter, especially since he didn't have a good relationship with his own father growing up. I mean, I think he liked Emily but I think it helped that she had a ready-made family and he could step right in and be the man of the house. Ok fine, Brad, do what you want. (But judging from the after-show, it looks like the couple has been having major problems anyway. Boy, who didn't see that coming?)

But the whole thing made me think about men in general…why is it that men–ok, I'll say some men, not all– seem to go with the "picture perfect" girl rather than the one that they actually like being around? I just don't get it. I've seen guys spend every waking moment with a girl, having fun, being themselves, feeling comfortable enough to tell all their deep dark secrets, but then when it comes time to choose a wife they go completely in the opposite direction and choose someone they have nothing in common with. Call me crazy but wouldn't you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody who's not only hot but someone you can also call a friend?

And women always get a bad rap for "missionary dating" — i.e. dating someone with hopes that they can turn the person around, i.e. they can be the one to make them get saved, or they can be the one to make them get a job and make something of their life — I think men do the same exact thing. I call it the "savior complex." I think some men secretly want to come into the lives of women and "save" them from what they see as destruction or misery. I think to an extent this is what happened with Brad and him wanting to jump in with Emily and be her daughter's, as he put it, "real father." (*scratches head–how is that even possible?). And I've seen my brothers in the church do it with women who weren't even believers or didn't even like coming to church. And people say women don't know what they want…lol. Well, I know what I don't want–someone I have nothing in common with, can't talk to, or am not friends with…but those are just my theories, to each his own…

Anywho, in other news…the rough cut of Class Picture is ready!! Woohoo! I meet with the editor in the morning so that I can look at it. I'm really excited to see the first cut. I've been in talks with the composer as well and he's putting togther some cool 80's-style music for the film as well. I'm really looking forward to having fun with this film and I can't wait to share it with you all! 

Well, here I am pulling another late-nighter as it is now 3:30 am. I love staying up late, though. I feel like I get much more done in the wee hours of the morning. But nevertheless, I do have to be up for my meeting in about 5 hours so I guess I better sign off.

Ciao for now!




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