Random Thoughts on a Monday Morning

2 04 2012

I’ve been pretty quiet and slow with the blogs because I’ve got a lot on my mind. I should be processing some of it here on Convergence. But you know how it is sometimes when you mistakenly keep things bottled up inside and then get frustrated because you can’t figure things out and you need someone to talk to but no one knows what youre going through because you keep it bottled up inside. Yeah, that’s what’s going on.

In just another 4 weeks the semester will be over and I will no longer be a professor, at least not at Howard, anyway. I’ll be on the road toward being a student again. Me. After 10 years. It’s been 10 years since I finished grad school. I feel old and sometimes I wonder “Can I really do this? Can I really be a student again?” I’m guessing that a lot of my classmates will be a lot younger than me. While this doesn’t really bother me, im just hoping it doesn’t hinder me from making friends.

I have to be honest there’s a part of me that wonders if God is moving me out of teaching to get me ready for something else. Like some ministry or even like back into production. I’ve been looking primarily for teaching jobs at colleges but now im opening myself up to staff positions and even church positions. Im waiting to see what doors will open.

In the meantime my heart is breaking. It’s breaking for every artist I’ll encounter in California who had or has big dreams of being a star but still feels a hole on the inside. My heart is breaking for every unhealthy black church. A lot of people who find out im moving to LA love to point out that LA is the mega church capital for black churches. I always thought that was ATL but ok, if that’s true, my heart is breaking for my brothers and sisters who think that bigger is better and that money and wealth and prosperity are the main perks of the bible.

I am so ready to be in California, it’s pretty much all I think about these days. Please pray for me that I can be patient over these next few weeks/months and that God will give me wisdom about the path where he is leading me.

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